What to do while you wait for couples therapy to start

1. Spend this time connecting with your own individual supports (either friends/family, therapists, coaches, spiritual community, being outside, working out...whatever you need to feel comfort or ease)

2. Spend some time writing out what you want to address in therapy; what you would want the other to know, and what you would need to feel to know therapy is working for you; what would you need to know/hear/feel to know your relationship is on the right track to recovery and trust.

To avoid getting overwhelmed I would literally set a timer for this, so 20 minutes or less of reflection. If you feel overwhelmed at any point walk away from it and go do a relaxing/grounding activity

3. Go slow, taking space is good, but feels impossible sometimes. Remind yourselves why you are taking this slow and why this is important. There is no quick fix when trust is broken, but there are steps to come back together. To be successful you need to take it slow, there will be time and space to talk things out, slowing down allows you to build the space needed to have these conversations successfully.

4. Find outlets. If it's hard for you to be in the in-between and take things slow, finding helpful outlets will allow you to sustain the needed wait (connecting with friends, yoga, running, creating, whatever helps you to get energy out)